Mondegreens are those well-known quotes—song lines, proverbs, and other famous sayings—that most of us repeat correctly, but a few of us inevitably hear wrong—like “Lucy in Disguise with Diamonds.” While children, naturally, commit a fair share of mondegreens, including “To the Republic for Richard Stands” (from the Pledge of Allegiance), adults are responsible for a surprising number of these laugh-out-loud goofs. You’d better hold your sides when you read this book, or you might break a rib laughing.
“My country steals from me.”
(Actual lyric: “My country, ’tis of thee.”)
“Sweet land of liver tea.”
(Actual lyric: “Sweet land of liberty.”)
“My country, ’tis of thee, sweet land of liberty, of the icing.”
(Actual lyric: “My country, ‘tis of thee, sweet land of liberty, of thee I sing.”)
“Don’t cry for me, Marge and Tina.”
(Actual lyric: “Don’t cry for me, Argentina.”)
“Ahab, the Arab, she got the burning Sam”
(Actual lyric: “Ahab, the Arab, Sheik of the burning sands.”)
“O, beautiful, for spaceship guys.”
(Actual lyric: “O, beautiful for spacious skies.”)
“I’ve thrown a custard in her face.”
(Actual lyric: “I’ve grown accustomed to her face.”)
“If our lips should meet in armor, rot, uh.”
(Actual lyric: “If our lips should meet, innamorata.”)
“There’s gonna be a crate day.”
(Actual lyric: “There’s gonna be a great day.”)
“Baking carrot biscuits.”
(Actual lyric: “Taking care of business.”)
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